100 Minutes Later, Still No Idea

I’ll be honest — I don’t know anything about Minecraft. I went in hoping for some kind of introduction or explanation. What I got instead was... chicken jockeys, a dramatic “I... am Steve,” and a lot of loud cheering for things I didn’t understand. Maybe if you're a fan, it all clicks. But as someone who doesn’t know a creeper from a crafting table, I was just along for the ride — and kind of wishing I'd brought a pillow.

After watching the Minecraft movie, I still don’t know what Minecraft is. I feel like I know less, actually.

I Felt Like the Only One Without a Pickaxe

The crowd was loving it — especially the younger ones. Every time someone said a phrase that was clearly Minecraft Important™, there were cheers. Meanwhile, I was just trying to figure out what the actual story was (still not sure). It’s silly, sure, and occasionally funny. Jason Momoa jetpacks around, and the visuals actually look good. But the plot? I couldn’t find one. Maybe it was hiding in a block of redstone or something.

Does A Minecraft Movie Work If You’re Not a Fan?

Not really. I think Minecraft fans will have a blast — they’ll get the references, laugh at the mobs, and feel the love. But for the rest of us? It’s like watching a fan-con fever dream. I closed my eyes at one point — my brain just gave up trying to make sense of anything.

Pixels, Punchlines & What Even Is a Chicken Jockey?

✅ Some laughs scattered throughout
✅ Visually, it actually looks solid

❌ Story? What story?
❌ Zero onboarding for non-Minecraft players
❌ I still don’t know what a chicken jockey is

Is A Minecraft Movie Worth Watching?

A Minecraft Movie isn’t bad — it’s just not made for people like me. The visuals are fun, the crowd clearly had a blast, and there were a few moments that made me chuckle. But I came in hoping for a beginner-friendly ride and got Minecraft: Expert Mode. If you love the game, you'll probably enjoy it. If you don’t? Maybe skip this one or bring a fan-friend to translate.